Zechariah 4:10 "For who has despised the day of small things? ...these are the eyes of the LORD which range to and fro throughout the earth."

We serve a huge God who loves to use small things.
Often the small moment is when He speaks biggest to me.
It makes my worries feel like a waste of time.
He reminds me in those moments that HE KNOWS.

A few Sundays ago, we had a small thing come up in Isabella's life.  Some of the girls had been holding their arms up to hers and saying how all of their skin was white, but that she was not.  Our girl is a very deep thinker, and her round eyes were full of questions.   

"Mom, is there something wrong with having brown skin?"  

Sometimes your heart hurts when your kids ask hard questions.  I quickly began to tell her how beautiful her brown skin is.  I explained that people paid money and went to great lengths to get her color of skin. I told her how pretty any color looks on her, because of her skin tone.  But, those eyes were still full of frustration.  

"But Mom, why is my skin brown and not white like the other girls."

Hard questions are...hard.  Isabella has faint memories of her birth mother, and we have had several conversations concerning her.  I am sure there are more to come.  However, she has never met or mentioned her birth father.  I explained that her birth father was from Mexico, and the Lord has given beautiful, brown skin to Mexican people.  Since she is a part of her birth mom and birth dad then she also has brown skin like him.  God made her just the way He wants her to be.  I told her that God loves and uses all people.  No matter what their skin color - brown, black, red, yellow or white. However, I could tell she was still worried and confused.

Later, we went to our Sunday evening service.  It "just so happened" that we had a visiting evangelist that evening.  His name was Bro. Garza.  He had a big, booming voice that grabbed our attention! Before his sermon, he introduced himself as a man from Mexico and God promised to love him and use him no matter what his skin color was - brown, black, red, yellow or white!  Isabella looked at me in absolute amazement.  "Mom, he said the same thing you did!"  I told her I felt the Lord arranged for Bro. Garza to be there at our church on that night, just for her.  I watched as the frustration and questions turned to awe and contentment.  

Small things.  He arranged this moment for my daughter, just to reassure her.  There is no doubt in my mind.  He arranged it for me, also.  There are always the worries of other hard questions concerning her adoption.  The fear of giving the wrong answers, and other fears as well.  He will be there before we get there.  

The sparrow,
the widow's lost coins,
the little boy's lunch,
the mustard seed,
a baby in a manger.
Small things.
He uses them to show us how big he really is.

"Our" girl turns 7 today.

I am thinking about you today.  We are strangers, yet share such a gift.  You gave birth to our girl.  I know from bits and pieces of paper work that you loved her, and I'm sure that you love her still. Our girl turns 7 today.  The mother's heart in me knows that you are thinking of her, remembering the events of the special day she came into this world.  She often questions me about you.  I do not have many answers and probably never will.  There is a place in her heart that will always long for you, as I know you long for her.

She is such a pretty girl.  She has big brown eyes that takes in every detail of what is going on around her. Our girl is an amazing reader.  Her penmanship is pure perfection.  She loves pretty, sparkely things. Neatness is a must in her world.  Everything has to be in perfect order at all times, or she feels like all will fall apart.  She is still tiny, but can eat like you would not believe.  Her laugh is cute and girly.  Her things are very important to her.  I always wanted a girly girl, and she is just that. She loves God.  I listen to her pray, and I'm amazed. She finds joy in her Bible, and treasures the words she reads there.  Her singing voice is beautiful, and I believe she has true talent.  She has lost two teeth this year, and can't wait to lose her next one. 

I wasn't there seven years ago.  I was not the first one to look into her soft brown eyes, or hear her first cries.  I never changed her diapers or fed her a bottle.  Our heart connection was not made in those first few moments of life.  But, I do thank you for being there.  I thank you for making the hard choices that you made by putting her needs above your own, and for letting go.  You have given her more than you can ever imagine. I pray for peace for you today as the two of us celebrate the life of "our" girl.  May she always know how much she is loved by both of her mamas.  

What does RICH mean?

Several weeks ago, I picked up one of Isabella's friends for an afternoon of play.  As soon as she was safely buckled in, my van was filled with a flow of girly chatter.  They discussed things such as the fact that they both had on silver shoes, to the flowers growing by the side of the road, to the need of a snack as soon as possible.  Little talking girls quickly grow up into big talking girls.  Their futures and growing up was just one of the many topics covered in the short 8 minute drive to our house. The little friend said she wanted to be very rich when she grows up.  Isabella was puzzled by the term "rich" and asked me what it meant.  Before I could squeeze in a word, her friend gave her a kindergartner's definition - "Rich means that you live in a very big house, and you have lots and lots and lots of stuff."  Isabella proudly sat back in her booster seat, and said with a very smug smile, "Well, if that's what it means, then I am already rich!" 

 

I had to smile at her confidence because I know we are definitely not rich in terms of big houses and lots of stuff.  However, I am thankful that, in her little way, she feels that she is rich in what she claims as her own.

 

I recalled this conversation as I sat and watched the news footage of the recent Oklahoma tornadoes and of the fires that consumed hundreds of acres in Colorado.  Homes, vehicles, valuables, "stuff" gone in an instant.  I watched as parents gathered their children close, and told stories about how they gripped their babies by their arm as the wind tried to take them, and how they dug through the rubble to pull out their loved ones.  They cried, hugged their families and said that none of it mattered.  It was all gone, but what mattered most was still there.  It was all just stuff.  

 

In the face of those tragedies, the Lord reminded me how rich I really am.  If all of the "stuff" were taken away, but I still have the One who promised to never forsake me, then I am rich beyond my wildest dreams.  Wealth that I wouldn't trade the world for!  Lord, let me look at your blessings all around and, like Isabella, be thankful that I am "rich" in the things that really matter. 

We had church, Presson-style!

Landry and Isabella had some happenin' church goin' on in the Presson house this past weekend.  Isabella opened with praise and worship.  Landry had prayer for all of the sick stuffed animals and then took up an offering.  In Landry's words, "Hallelujah, Sis. Presson (Isabella) gave $167.00 in the offering tonight!!!" (Not sure where she got all that money from) But, according to Landry, she is going to receive quite a blessing in return.  Landry took his text from Matthew 5 and preached an amazing sermon on the Beatitudes.  I wish I had taken notes, because he had some powerful thoughts. (seriously!  He amazes me!)    Every few minutes he would leave his "pulpit" to help Isabella find the correct scripture that he was reading from. (so cute!)  After his fire and brimstone sermon to all of the poor in spirit and pure in heart, he asked Isabella to come sing a song for altar service.  Much to Landry's frustration, the Lord moved on her heart to end the service with a energized rendition of "Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree."  THAT is when I laughed until I cried.  Landry was furious because there is no way that souls can be saved to that song!  Thank you, Mom and Dad for buying Isabella a Dora Explorer microphone for Christmas.  It has brought mucho fun-o!

Making Wishes

 

The year of 2012 brought the Pressons a precious gift. A wish was granted to me that I made many years ago. As a young girl, I often dreamed of my handsome husband, and my home full of dark-headed little girls with big, pink, hair bows. However, the Lord chose to fill my home with wonderful, rowdy boys. Yet, the wish of my dark-headed girl was never far away. As always, the Lord heard my prayers and granted Clark and me with the desire of our hearts. Isabella visited our home for the first time in January of this year. When I heard she was coming, I went to the store and bought my first doll. I stood in the baby doll aisle at Target and cried, much to Riley's dismay. It wasn't long until she was in our home permanently as our foster child.

Our boy-filled world took an about-face. Our girl is certainly “all-girl.” She loves all things pink, sparkly, frilly, and the more shoes the better! She is a shopper just like her Mama. The two of us have no problem shopping for hours and hours, and exclaiming over the beautiful items that we find. She is all about rainbows, unicorns, and coloring books. I have learned many things this past year. I learned that a tiara must be worn when having an afternoon snack. I learned that a new pink rug in a girl's room must be danced on with your Daddy. (For those of you that know Clark, YES, he did dance on that pink rug) Hair bows must be worn at all times, even if it is just to go outside and play football with your big brothers. And new, shiny lip gloss can cause all kinds of excitement. Not all of our days have been filled with lace and bliss. Transition can be hard, and when both of the females in the home like to have control...watch out! But with the Lord's help, we are learning the zillion little differences between raising boys and raising our girl.

One morning, Isabella called me to the window in her very pink bedroom. “Mama, Mama. Look, our yard is full of wishes!” I looked and saw a yard in need of mowing, full of dandelions that had gone to seed. Our yard was dotted with hundreds of stems of white fluff just waiting to be blown off by a girl with a wish. A yard full of wishes. We went outside and blew as many dandelions and made as many wishes that we could think of. Later, she quietly said, “Mama, do you know what I REALLY wish? I wish that when I was a little baby, I could have been your baby.” I tried to explain that the Lord had other plans, and she is our forever girl now. Wishes are quiet little things that seep into our minds and have a way of burying into our hearts. That is exactly what Isabella has done. She has buried herself deep into our hearts.

Today, we go before the judge and sign our papers to officially make her our forever girl,

Isabella Hope Presson.

Once again, the Lord has proven to me that wishes really do come true!

 

Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.

Psalms 37:4